The Weekly News Review: A look at the headlines from the past week.This week’s news has behaved like a hyperactive Labrador in a stately home: bounding through history, knocking over priceless objects, and leaving the nation wondering who, exactly, is meant to be in charge!?

We begin with the King, who has once again been wheeled out for Trooping the Colour, the annual ceremony in which the Royal Family stands very still while horses do all the actual work. 

London was awash with flags, uniforms, and tourists loudly asking where Paddington Bear lives!? The sovereign’s official birthday was marked with the usual mixture of pomp, pageantry, and at least one Guardsman fainting in the heat, proving that tradition is alive and well, even if the participants occasionally aren’t.

Meanwhile, in the world of money  specifically, too much of it! Elon Musk has become the world’s first trillionaire after SpaceX shares exploded upwards during the biggest stock market debut in history. Analysts described the event as “unprecedented”, “extraordinary”, and “deeply annoying for anyone who still checks their bank balance before buying a sandwich”! Musk now possesses enough wealth to buy several small nations, though he will presumably spend it on rockets, tunnels, and increasingly unhinged social media posts. Economists are still trying to work out how one man can be worth more than the GDP of Portugal without technically owning Portugal.

Back on British soil, Hertfordshire Zoo has announced the arrival of twin elephant shrew pups, which is adorable, surprising, and statistically improbable. The black and rufous sengi pair have “defied the odds”, which is zoological shorthand for “we genuinely didn’t think they’d manage it”. The zoo now houses the majority of the UK’s elephant shrew population, which is both heart‑warming and slightly alarming! if anything happens to Hertfordshire, we lose the lot! Somewhere, a conservationist is already drafting a contingency plan involving bubble wrap.

In political news, the government has decided that the UK’s electric car sales targets are to be weakened, presumably because the original targets were too ambitious, too expensive, or too environmentally helpful! Ministers insist the move is “pragmatic”, which is Westminster code for “we’ve changed our minds and please stop asking questions”. Environmental groups responded with the usual mixture of disappointment, fury, and long threads on social media that nobody reads past the third sentence! 

We also bid farewell to Roy Hattersley, former Labour deputy leader, who has died aged 93. Hattersley was a towering figure of the party’s old guard, known for his intellect, his principles, and his ability to appear on political panel shows without shouting. Tributes poured in from across the spectrum, many of them featuring phrases like “a true statesman”, “a voice of reason”, and “they don’t make them like that anymore”, which is depressingly accurate.

Elsewhere, the Prime Minister has announced a social media ban for under‑16s, covering Snapchat, TikTok, YouTube, Instagram, Facebook and X. Teenagers reacted with the kind of horror normally reserved for cancelled festivals. Parents, meanwhile, celebrated briefly before realising they may now have to talk to their children! Tech companies are preparing statements expressing “concern”, “disappointment”, and “please don’t do this”.

And finally, Britain has lost one of its oldest natural icons: the Major Oak of Sherwood Forest, believed to be up to 1,200 years old and linked to the legend of Robin Hood. Experts say the ancient tree has died, marking the end of a living connection to folklore, history, and thousands of school trips involving soggy sandwiches. The forest remains, but something vast and quietly magnificent has gone.

So that’s your week: royal spectacle, trillion‑pound fortunes, heroic shrews, weakened climate promises, political farewells, digital crackdowns, and the passing of a giant. 

Britain marches on confused, contradictory, and endlessly entertaining.