The Weekly News Review. 17th October 2025.

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Here’s your weekly news roundup, Jim Corbridge style: a rant, a roast, and a reality check served hot and cynical.


I've noticed how the news these days reads like a rejected Black Mirror script!? Let’s take a stroll through the week’s headlines, shall we?

So first up peace in Gaza. That’s right, Trump’s back and apparently brokered a ceasefire. Yes, the same bloke who thinks diplomacy is a brand of cologne. And the UK? We’re over here clapping like trained seals while the ceasefire holds together with duct tape and denial.

Meanwhile, back in Blighty, the Chancellor’s warning us about tax hikes. Because apparently, the best way to fix a broken economy is to squeeze the people who didn’t break it. PPE Medpro’s under fire again millions in dodgy contracts, but sure, let’s go after your nan’s heating allowance!

And speaking of heat, the UK’s cyber defences are getting more action than a Love Island villa. Four major cyberattacks a week, and that’s just the ones we notice. Hackers are the new rockstars except instead of guitars, they shred your NHS records.

Oh, and in the “You Can’t Make This Up” department: a former funeral director admitted to 35 counts of fraud. That’s right he was double booking the dead. Somewhere, Monty Python is taking notes.

Across the pond, Elon Musk’s been whispering in Nigel Farage’s rival’s ear, trying to start a new party. Because nothing says “stable democracy” like a tech billionaire playing political Pokémon.

And finally, Gavin Williamson—remember him? The guy who thought kids should learn via carrier pigeon during lockdown!? He’s now admitting school closures were a mistake. No kidding, Gav. Next you’ll be telling us water is wet and Boris Johnson’s hair is a lie.

So there you have it. The world’s on fire, the UK’s holding the matches, and the only thing rising faster than sea levels is your blood pressure. But don’t worry they’ll probably tax that too.




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